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My favourite Canuck took me to Alexandra Plalace for bonfire night . There was chips from the fish shop with loads of vinegar and Pimms winter (a tad too sweet for my taste, marginally better than mulled wine), beer (Old Hooky , Sunchaser though pathetically I can't remember which others were consumed), some more deep fried goodness which made me almost regret I did not think of using the camera option on my phone, there is after all no elegant way to eat a filled churro (for some strange reason they look way les appetising in those pictures than they did after a couple of beers I guess it's the lack of fried sweet dough smell which does it) .
Please note that the picture is not one of mine (I felt too lazy to carry the camera with me). It belongs to Richard Child's/Ricardo Chicco's flickr photostream . I hope he won't mind me using it since it appears to have been taken fairly close to where we were standing (slightly closer to the trees but the same angle).
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5.11.06 22:37 |
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Step by step instructions Step 1 Go to chemist to buy toothbrush head for child's electric toothbrush. Find that the chemist has ran out. Make the mistake to browse. Notice special offer on hair colour, decide to try new brand for a change. Step 2 Open hair colour box. Unfold instructions and peel off the gloves. Unscrew bottle cap 1 and 2 with teeth. Pour contents of bottle 1 in bottle 2 while reading the rest of the instructions. Spill some of the contents of bottle 2 on the bathroom worktop. Notice spillage. Say "darnit" a lot. Grab bottle 1, screw cap back on and start shaking while grabbing toilet paper and wiping spillage with the other hand, saying "darnit, darnit, darnit" some more and wondering of the effect of the mix missing some of the contents of bottle 2. Remember other brand does not involve pouring liquids from one bottle to the other, although on second thoughts there is a chopping off the tip of the bottle with teeth and spitting out chemicals part involved in that one... nobody's perfect. Step 3 Put gloves on. Decide they were designed for giant women or transexuals, feel more clumsy while wearing gloves than usual. Remember there is a box of small size latex gloves in the utility room. Walk to the ustility room in state of undress. Scare the cat in the process (though I don't think it was the lack of clothing that did it, or at least I hope it wasn't). Fail to find box of gloves. return to bathroom. Step 4 Apply colour. Decide that there is a reason why creme colourant was invented. Put bottle back on cabinet to grab toilet paper to wipe of river of colourant running down neck. Miss cabinet by a fraction. Shout "crottes de biques en chocolat". Use more toilet paper to wipe splatters. Run out of paper. Look for another roll. lean hed on cabinet to reach roll which has escaped underneath. Wipe off smears of colour on cabinet. Apply whatever is left of the mix on hair. Step 5 Realise application time is long forgotten, retrieve instructions from bin while still wearing die covered gloves. Suck teeth like a grandma and shake head at own stupidity. Roll eyes for good measure while grabbing more toilet paper and wiping the the bin before it dries. Realise watch is upstairs in bedroom. Decide to not risk splattering carpeted areas and set kitchen timer instead. Ignore tingling sensation on scalp. Ignore sensation a bit longer. Step 6 Turn shower into a film set murder scene. Rinse some more and mourn falling hair which has gone to clog the drain (joining the thousands which have been doing an autumn leaf impression for the last 3 months). Open conditioner sachet with teeth. Remember other brand has conditioner in a little plastic bottle. Step 7 Dry hair. Decide colour is a bit meh. I guess I am not ready for a fun pink Betty (as seen chez Daisy ) |
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8.11.06 22:01 |
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What are the odds "Do you think he'll notice he hasn't got his lights on?". That's how the conversation with the stranger at the bus stop started, while I was leaning on the post where the timetable is displayed, waiting for the bus home after the gig. Some how we got to "They are at the difficult second album stage. How was the gig?". "Better than I thought it would be on the strength of the album." Blah blah blah (I do not recall all of the conversation to be honest, beer does that to me, it steals my memory). "I was assured it's their attempt at being ironic but I don't think there is any excuse for opening with a Phil Collins cover, especially 'against all odds'". "They are being ironic". "Having seen their young fan base swaying and singing it with all their hearts I doubt it comes through, there was even a lighter being waved about. Plain wrong". *stranger laughs*. Blah blah blah. "The first support band was truly awful, not even the sort of bad that is entertainingly bad, just plain bad. The second support band though gave a really good show, I liked them, I don't think they'll ever sell any records but I give them full marks for entrtainment. I wish I remembered what they are called, they were from Liverpool, 3 of them with a song about sitcking bits of each other in each other". "Do they have an a cappella opening number?". "Yes, how did you know? Were you at the gig too?" (my powers of deductions aren't too sharp at the best of time). "No, but I saw them in Bath, they are called Hot Club de Paris " blah blah blah
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12.11.06 23:36 |
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To do list
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15.11.06 21:58 |
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It's simple really Sniffles = bad Home from work when not quite been there long enough to qualify for sick pay = not so good but don't care Wearing a big jumper in November = rare sight Wearing said jumper indoors = most unusual The heating on during the day, cranking it up a couple of degrees and today I don't care if the penguins go homeless = good Being brought soup with chunks in so I get the notion it's not just warm and wet because honestly everything tastes the same = most excellent Playing with the camera to forget daytime tv is dire and i don't do sick = neat even if the results are not very good Crazy cat thinking "she who worms me and can reach teh food cupboard" will do for a scratch and a smooth = unusual but in a good way nap before dinner = good hot bath = good Temptation to top up with more scalding water averted = good (slow learner) Going back to bed after checking emails = probably a good idea |
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16.11.06 21:41 |
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I am a mean mess creating machine Him Indoors coming home this lunchtime and sitting down trying to diagnose why my laptop is poorly: "look at the state of this place, it's a right mess, anybody would think you were home for a few days". I still don't know how I managed it while just slouching around trying to workout why Friday mornings episodes of whatever was on daytime TV were exactly the same as Thursday afternoon's. I did though, he is right there is a bombsite feel to the place that only comes from exposure to my unique talent. |
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18.11.06 13:03 |
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Kids, love 'em, couldn't eat a whole one mind... As Christine was demonstrating to her children the art of splitting a sponge in 2 and sandwiching it with a yummy filling, her teenage daughter exclaims "you know, if you had an attractive face, you could have your own cookery programme".
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20.11.06 21:50 |
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