After one of those "i've had enough of my hair" moments I stepped into the salon at lunchtime (as you do, without an appointment of course, and it is well known that a salon that you can just walk in and find empty at lunchtime is going to give you a quality haircut, yes really I *am* really *that* stoopid sometimes). Then there was all the trying to explain what I wanted and gesturing in front of the mirror. See, that bit needs to be neat and i want all these kinky bits cut off and absolutely no layers. Hairdresser #1 walks to the back of the shop "can you take this one, it's too difficult". Hairdresser #2 comes out. Repeat of the explanation and gesturing capped with "I just don't want all the bits that stick out any more, just level it off and maybe if i keep all the weight of it it may just stay down easier". Hairdresser: #2 It's wavy, you just need to blow dry it. Me: I know, I did, and ran it through the straighteners and used straightening balm, this morning. Hairdresser #2: oh I see. Much ooh-ing and aah-ing. So you want me to turn your graduated bob into a straight bob. Inner me: alleluia the hair is sprayed damp and the cutting start, and so does the light chat which she fails to see is making me cringe in the chair. I don't do hairdresser chat. She has taken off a couple of inches from the front of the bob when she tries a new tactic to engage me in the conversation. Haidresser #2: I love your perfume, it's Gucci isn't it? me: no it isn't inner me: do I tell her I am not actually wearing any perfume today so she is either smelling the imaginary friend she is having the one sided conversation with or the lovely hand cream from work or my washing powder or do i just fib and give her the name of something I'd actually wear if I was wearing perfume? Hairdresser: are you sure, I just know it is, I love that smell, it's Gucci. inner me: do I look like I'd wear Gucci? Come on lady give me some credit. me: It's Issey Miyake Haidresser 2: your fringe is very heavy you need to take some of the weight off Inner me: oh no I don't, the weight of it is the only thing that stops it from turning into some wild kink fest. me: I'd rather you didn't. If you lighten it it *will* kink. hairdresser #2: I do it differently, you'll see, it won't kink. Me: I like the weight of it hairdresser #2: it's too heavy, it will look better she holds the fringe and chops at it in a movement of the scissors that resembles every previous attempt at lightening the fringe I have ever encountered before. I cannot see how her way is different, but it's too late, the chopped off wisps of hair have already flown past my eyes. hairdresser #2: see, no kink As the dampness of the fringe dries of, it starts to kink as predicted. I sigh. She then starts playing with my hair, moving the parting to the other side, then getting rid of the parting altogether and spreading the fringe out on my forehead making me look like a shaggy dog. inner me: stop pawing me you crazy woman, leave my hair alone. hairdresser: it's very important to play with your hair you know, so you can find out what suits you. I put the parting back the way i would normally choose to wear it and sweep the fringe back to the side, out of my eyes. Get up, walk to the counter, pay. Since nobody at work has said anything, I am uncertain if it has made no noticeable change to the way I look or if it's just so awful they feel they shouldn't comment. To test the theory, I have died it red tonight. We'll see if that gets noticed. Update: nobody noticed the change of colour either.
Trust me i'm a hairdresser
15.8.07 20:36
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Violet / Website (15.8.07 23:32) Please forgive me for laughing - heartily - at this entire story. There is a very good reason for my long, unkempt, ridiculously uneven hair. 
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Jiiiiim!!! / Website (16.8.07 09:52) Buy some clippers. That way you can trim it fairly short all over AND you never have to go to the hairdressers again. It's worked for me for the last twenty years! |
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geoff@geofftech.co.uk / Website (16.8.07 17:28) Hey! your hair looks different! have you had it cut or something? |
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stroppycow / Website (16.8.07 19:17) Violet: A few weeks in an office full of very girly girls has twisted my brain enough to make me think I need to at least try and make an effort. It won't last Oh reverend Jim, yours are words of wisdom, unfortunately I am not blessed with a nice even cranium which would allow me to sport as close a cut as yours. Geoff: well thanks for noticing... work colleagues didn't mention the change of colour either. Neither did colleagues from previous work I bumped into today one of them noticed the new jeans but not the hair. I guess they are so used to it looking a disaster tehy stopped noticing. |
