... so why does The Boy's Father feel he has to prove us right over and over again ? Recently the number of times The Boy sees his father has decreased. It used to be one evening a week + 1 week-end in 3 + a couple of weeks during the Summer holiday. But the Boy's father has moved to the other side of London so the 1 evening a week has become too impractical for him. We have been accomodating by lenghtning the week-end (adding the Friday night to it). For a number of reasons we have a strict policy of if you miss your visit you lose it (unless there is prior agreement - say a special event or a pre planned visit to grand-parents). The Boy always looks forward to the time he spends with his father, and to be fair The Boy's Father does tend to make an effort and take him places. Recently though The Boy's father has been complaining about the visits. He finds rugby training and matches on a Sunday are impractical, we know they are, they eat our week-ends too (even the ones when The Boy is not officially with us since Him Indoors has managed to get roped into helping with coaching), but since it make The Boy happy to go to rugby and run around a field with a ball we just arrange our lives around it, that's what parents do. He brought The Boy back early a few visits ago because The Boy was tired and did not particularly fancy going out in the afternoon (he wanted to stay in and play with his toys). Rather than change the plan of restaurant + whatever he had in mind to quick lunch at home an quiet sunday afternoon, he brought The Boy home so he could get on with his afternoon. On Friday he managed to excel himself. I called him to check if he wanted The Boy to be fed before he was picked up or not. He confessed, he had FORGOTTEN it was his week-end. Now most fathers would have said something along the lines of I can't make it tonight but I'll pick him up tomorrow morning, have him ready for whatever time. Not The Boy's Father. He had other plans and since to him the child must fit around his life rather than the other way round The Boy lost out. Until you have had to answer "Why is my daddy not coming to get me today ?" you have no idea how much you can despise an ex partner. Because you are not supposed to slag off the father of your child in front of them I struggled to come up with a reason. Right or wrong I went for the truth "he forgot" and broke The Boy's heart. Him Indoors came to the rescue on Saturday when it looked like we were going to have a bored sulky child on our hands for the entire week-end. He took The Boy to the driving range for the first time and he loved it. I suppose it's a bloke thing to find therapeutic value in hitting a little ball with a stick. I don't really get it but if it works I'll be gratefull for it. They went through 100 balls amongst the 2 of them and came back happy people. Today he had a good run at rugby and has enjoyed watching Monster's Inc for the umpteenth time all squished on the sofa between the 2 of us. Now it's my turn to do some mummy magic. We have got the mincer out and The Boy is ready to turn the handle to mince pork to make pate. Some friends are coming next Sunday and it will be the perfect starter with a green salad and some of Him Indoor's bread. Since it needs to rest and mature before you can eat it today's a good time to do it. Who said you can't combine the practical with pleasure. If more TLC is called for we may even make a cake (whole orange cake anybody ?).
We know he is a moron...
8.2.04 17:25
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(8.2.04 20:22) I think you are handling it all admirably.A sweetie for the boy! All The Best, Mark |
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(9.2.04 20:57) receipe for orange cake please. You are a brill mummy and hime in doors is doing a great job. Your boy was sooooooooo lucky to be squashed up on the sofa watching the vid with you. |
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christine (9.2.04 21:12) hey, ditto to princess above, on both counts. The cake sounds scrummy, and The Boy is a credit to you and T; you know we all think he is great round our house. |
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(9.2.04 21:59) Mark: thanks, The Boy will enjoy it. Princess: you wish is may comand, recipe in latest entry. Him Indoors is good, I don't believe in making the same mistake twice, so the second time round I chose somebody who is reliable. Christine: I have given up on baking bread. His is always nicer than mine. I stick to cakes and ice cream. |
